So the agnostic loves someone else. I can't blame him, she's beautiful, smart, funny, and really just overall great. I just met her about two months ago, but I can see us becoming good friends.
But last night, I was hanging out in the lounge, and the two of them walked in, nicely dressed. They had just gone to a movie. Together. Alone. Then they left, and several of my friends started asking if "something is going on between them". Basically, yes.
I was heartbroken. My stomach was already declaring war on me, but it got exponentially worse within those few catacalysmic seconds. While my friends were lightheartedly debating if the two of them had just gone on a date, I was supressing the vomit. I kept a smile, fiercely hoping that no one could read into what I was sure was a terrified expression.
I left, blaming my sour stomach for my inability to function and socialize. Then I sulked. The pain was really unbearable, and there was nothing I could do. He doesn't want me. And I'm absolutely sure now. Luckily, my lovely roommate and very good friend helped me so well. We made stupid paper snowflakes and listened to Christmas music. She patiently listening while I complained. But I really felt better. I didn't go to sleep until very late, and I still don't have my appetite back quite yet. But I'm better.
If this is what happens after a little rejection, with a boy (albeit a perfect one) I've only known for two months, Lord knows what will happen if I ever get dumped. Assuming I ever enter a relationship.
But I'm better. I just talked to him a little, and I didn't gag the entire time. I'm focusing on his flaws. He has short legs. As if that matters. But I have to find something to make me move on.
I can break and take it with a smile.
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